Sorry, I have no pictures on this post because I’ve never seen Kevin, but I know quite a bit about him.
See, when I got my new Mac a couple years ago, I also got a new e-mail address which is surprisingly spam free, at least for the most part.
So when an e-mail came through from Peggy to Kevin, I looked at it, but didn’t pay much attention. The e-mail was something about college applications and harmless – it wasn’t some weird ad for a miracle cure for broken toenails or falling-out hair or anything. Just a nice note from Peggy to Kevin about college. I deleted it.
Life went on. A couple months later I got another Peggy to Kevin e-mail. Again about college and again harmless so, being in a hurry, I deleted this one, too.
This happened another time, but there was such a long time in between the e-mails and normally I’d see the subject line on my Blackberry and just delete it without opening it.
But Kevin must now be a senior because suddenly I am getting e-mails from just about every college in the US – and now I can’t stop this because they are coming from the individual colleges themselves. I mean, every once in a while I take the time to block one – but that’s just one of well, dozens.
I guess my friend Kevin did well on his SATs because all the universities want him and are all offering to send him videos of their beautiful campuses and outstanding facilities.
Last week Kevin had a birthday – and that also inspired many colleges to e-mail him and wish him “Happy Birthday.”
Now I feel as if I’m ruining Kevin’s life. He has no idea that all these colleges are fighting over him and I have no way of telling him (since I know longer have the Peggy to Kevin e-mails). He is out there, floating around cyberspace, thinking he’s destined for a life flipping burgers.
So, if you know Kevin, please tell him I have his mail.